The Relationship Series Part 2: How to Grow Together in a Conscious Partnership with Alyssa Benjamin and David Sleininger

What does a healthy, fulfilling partnership look and feel like? How can we navigate the trials and tribulations of romantic relationships with grace? This episode, part 2 of the relationship series, explores the lessons and experiences that shape what I’m referring to as a “conscious relationship.” The first part of this series, episode 62, revealed the types of relationships and patterns that my partner David and I were in before we met. This episode brings you into our current relationship dynamics and what we’ve learned about ourselves and each other in the four and a half years of our partnership.

“I think one of the best thing’s we’ve done to ensure the likelihood of our long term success is to really see this relationship as something that’s unfolding in the present moment, and being very open and flexible about what that will look like in a month, a year, in a decade.” - David Sleininger

In this episode, we discuss: what we mean when we use the term “conscious relationship”; the cultural messaging that warps our perspective on romantic relationships; what to do if you’re invested in personal growth and your partner is not; how a trigger can be our greatest teacher; the practice that will exponentially grow your self-awareness; navigating conflict in a healthy and productive way and why it can be the greatest gift of a relationship.

“Relationships are not meant to solve your problems. They’re meant to invite you to solve your problems.” - Alyssa Benjamin
“One of the aspects of a healthy relationship that feels better than anything else in the world is feeling seen and accepted by your partner for who you are, and you can’t get to that place without radical communication and honesty, because then you’re not showing yourself and not allowing them the opportunity to hold and witness you.” - Alyssa Benjamin
“A lot of our closeness has come from the healthy and successful resolution of conflict.” - David Sleininger
“I think one of the best thing’s we’ve done to ensure the likelihood of our long term success is to really see this relationship as something that’s unfolding in the present moment, and being very open and flexible about what that will look like in a month, a year, in a decade.” - David Sleininger
“We don’t need each other. We choose each other. And every day is an invitation to choose each other or not.” - Alyssa Benjamin

Resources

Show Notes

What we mean when we use the term “conscious relationship”
The cultural messaging that warps our perspective of romantic relationships
The most important element in a conscious relationship
What to do if you’re invested in personal growth and your partner is not
How a trigger can be our greatest teacher
Ways to cultivate greater self awareness
The practice that will exponentially grow your self-awareness
Navigating conflict in a healthy and productive way
The reminder that has helped us get to a resolution of a conflict a lot quicker
A few key elements of conflict in our relationship
The pleasure of a heartfelt apology
Why conflict can be the greatest gift of a relationship
Radical honesty and brave communication are necessary - here’s why
How to show up for your partner when they’re going through a tough time
How to build a lasting, long-term connection, especially after marriage and kids
A few of our relationship policies that keep the mystery alive ;)
The best thing we’ve done to ensure the likelihood of our relationship’s longterm success